Roxanne Lee Brown

Roxanne Lee Brown, born to Georgina Victoria Anne Watson (Brown) and William Hubert Brown on December 21, 1954 in Ottawa, Canada.  My older brother Randal Keith Brown was born December 22, 1953 in Edmonton, Alberta, my younger brother Theodore David Brown was born January 17th, 1956 in Turner Valley, Alberta and my youngest sister Beverly Lynn Brown was born May 9th, 1962 in Edmonton, Alberta.  You can see by the birthdates that for many years I was the middle child between two boys and this defined my growing up years.

My parents never really spoke about the early years so I do not know how they saw me as a toddler and younger child.  I do know that from the time I can remember I was a competitive girl always trying to prove I could do it just as good (if not better) than the boys.  I was the typical image of a ‘tom boy’ growing up.  I played sandlot baseball and football and was a regular on the outdoor hockey rink, almost always the only girl amongst the boys.  While I was a tough cookie when playing with the boys, aside from that I was always a pretty emotional being.   

I cried easily when Mom or Dad were angry with me and often heard, “Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about,” while growing up.  My dad was military and things in our home were very hierarchical.  Dad was at the top and we kids were at the bottom, Mom was somewhere in the middle although it was Mom I was most scared of.  We had a lot of rules growing up hence my penchant for not always following them as an adult.  Chores were a regular part of life; setting the table,  making our beds, dishes, ironing my Dad’s work shirts and making lunches were mine.  The boys polished Dad’s shoes and were generally responsible for the outdoor work.  It is strange to me in looking back that the chores were separated according to gender as my dad was often cooking and cleaning at home in a day when that wasn’t the norm.

Our lives as children were filled with sports.  The boys played hockey, I played fastball and we all played whatever school sports were happening.  As I grew up fastball was my favourite sport although it was closely followed by swimming.  During high school my summer job was lifeguarding and teaching swimming at the base pool in Comox. This remains one of my favourite jobs!  I continued with sports until I was around 50.  In Chilliwack I found a great group of ladies and we played basketball, volleyball, field hockey and fastball together.

My dad’s approach to learning had a big impact on me growing up.  He was never afraid to do anything and mistakes were expected when learning something new.  I can remember him saying more than once, “Oh well, that didn’t work out, we’ll have to go back to the drawing board.”  I had many jobs over my lifetime; babysitting, delivering papers, selling greeting cards door to door, lifeguarding, cleaning motel rooms with Mom and Dad, working in banks (teller, accounts, loans, secretarial ), Super Value cashier, sports reporter (Chilliwack paper), typesetter at the Agassiz Advance, teacher, counsellor, vice principal, principal, faculty associate at FVU, statue instructor, marriage commissioner and TOC.  I liked a lot of these jobs and even loved a couple of them but I was never career minded and often my choices were made because people talked me into doing what they thought I would be good at.  Honestly, while there were many rewarding moments along the way I think I would have been pretty happy working at whatever. I feel my ‘calling’ in life was FAMILY.  I never really felt overwhelmed (okay, maybe once or twice) raising four kids and in spite of starting at a very young age I feel like I put my heart and soul into that part of my life in a way that I never did with work.

As I settled into life and you guys all started growing up I lost some of my love of sport and shifted more towards the arts.  I never saw myself as creative but when that side emerged I embraced it fully and cannot imagine my life now without that creating piece.

As I look back, at almost 70 years of age, I have very few regrets.  I have lived life well, pursued things that interest me, gone places, seen things and done things that my young self would never have imagined possible.  I have loved with everything I have and continue to see miracles in every day.  I have created images, artwork, stories and poems that speak to my heart and will be (aside from my family) my greatest accomplishments.

I have much left to experience in life and hope this quote holds true for me:

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely, in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy Shit, what a ride!”

I have not written about Dad and I in this story for that is one that needs to be told all by itself.